As a parent, few things tug at the heartstrings more than seeing your child navigate the world without the skills they need to thrive. For parents of autistic children, this feeling can be an everyday reality—fraught with challenges and little heartbreaks. One of the most poignant moments in my journey as a parent started a few months ago when my 4-year-old, after a day at daycare, simply said, "I have no friends mummy, I don’t want to go to daycare."
The innocence in his voice was juxtaposed with an inexplicable sadness that washed over me. I wanted nothing more than to wave a magic wand and create a world full of laughter, playdates, and the comforting bonds of friendship for him. Yet, the reality was stark: while he had an innate yearning to connect and have friendships, the social skills of typical children his age made this difficult for him.
Each day, when it was time to pick him up from daycare, I would hide myself for what I might see. Standing at the edge of the playground, my heart would clench at the sight of him, gazing out the gate, waiting for me. There he was, surrounded by laughter and games, but perfectly alone—an island in a sea of activity.
These moments are crushing, yet they also made me want to do more to my resolve to find ways to bridge that gap for him. It’s a call to action, a reminder of the importance of creating environments where he, and children like him, can not only feel included but also truly be a part of the community around them.
I think it is so important for parents of neurotypical children to be part of the growing awareness and have access to resources available today. Many organisations and therapists offer social skills groups specifically designed for children on the autism spectrum. While this doesn’t offer a magical solution, it is a step towards providing him the tools he needs to reach out and build those crucial social connections. In addition, I’ve realised that I need to create a toolkit for parents of neurotypical children who would also benefit from an autism toolkit.
So I made a book about my little guy - his stims, his special interests and his sensory sensitivities. I have printed it (6 pages on an A4) and provided it to his classmates at daycare. The feedback I’ve received has been overwhelming - it has been amazing and I know this is a positive step in the right direction as an autism advocate!
Here is a link template to the book if you want to use the same one:
- Template for social story about me to send to others when starting daycare/school